Page 9

By Jack Joseph Smith

Mr. Clean Caribbean Sea Suggestion: Instead of the astro projection, Animal is pulled from the ocean by men (Hawaiian) who have reached him far out from the shore through the use of surf boards. (The rescue of Frank Sinatra as an example) He is brought back to the island, and there informed that he has been saved by a report from the Sleeping Beauty. (Her named should be changed from Lithia to the Brown Sleeping Beauty in terms of how Animal refers to her) This situation would make it possible to cut her decussion with the administrator. The opening would then be his directly coming out of the mountains, with no flash backs to her due to the explanation given by the Hawaiian men on the beach after his rescue. At his point a helicopter could be in the sky (already called) to take him to Honolulu. From there the story continues to Los Angeles. Some more bullshit that I'm not going to do.. Ain't Eating

Original Scan

AI Interpretation

GPT

This revision note proposes replacing an astro projection with a concrete ocean rescue by Hawaiian men, then moving Animal quickly from Honolulu to Los Angeles.

The page is mostly construction note rather than finished narrative. It shows the author trying to simplify the opening mechanics, rename or reframe the Sleeping Beauty figure, cut an administrative discussion, and keep the plot moving. The irritated handwritten bottom note makes the page feel like an argument with the draft itself.

Claude

A working note addressed to the author by the author, proposing that Animal be rescued from the ocean by Hawaiian surfers (Sinatra-style) rather than by astral projection, and that Lithia be renamed the Brown Sleeping Beauty. The page is not narrative at all — it is the manuscript showing its own construction, naming plot problems and proposing fixes.